Rakesh's movie talk
Tango & Cash (1989) |
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I believe the whole of 80s is more guilty than 70s. For one, they gave bad pop music. The
hairstyles are bad, much worse than 70s. No comments about the dress, though the women are the maligned lots I’m afraid.
On the movie side, there was teen fraternity comedies (hey, the ‘showy’ ones are good, though), cheap horror movies
and buddy cop movies. Witness the success of the latter with films like 48 Hours, Lethal Weapon (and sequels),
Red Heat and the subject of this review Tango and Cash. Of them all, I rate Tango as the worse. So bad,
that actually you don’t mind coming back and investigate its badness. For one, I
think Stallone is miscast. He is absolutely bad in comedy that he should have stuck to the usual monosyllabic grunting block
of concrete like in Rambo films and Cobra. Here, he even had the chick to deride his own character Rambo, in
one sequence where this exchange took place: Anonymous
cop: He thinks he's Rambo. Stallone: Rambo is a pussy. Next, the crime story is painfully predictable. Very comic book stuff, where the only thing
missing a guy with mask and cape. Jack Palance reprises his usual creepy bad guy role, with horrible dialogues (even worse
than the 60s superhero tv cartoon). It nauseated me when he was playing with those mice. Yuck! We got your point, Jack. Coming back to the story. Now, Kurt Russell is Cash, the slobbish cop and Stallone is Tango,
the dapper, wall street dealin' cop. Both are so famous and have been instrumental in the Palance's characters anger. They
keep busting Palance's people and this is not making the old man any mellower, if you pardon my Greek. Palance devices a plot
to trap these two and succeeds as Tango and Cash are convicted of a crime they didn't commit. Okay, you see the friction between
these two, and add to that Palance's bad guy. Throw is some bad puns and one-liners, unbelievable hardware (the RV would make
Q blush) and tonnes of explosion you have action buddy cop film. Now, is it that bad? I actually enjoyed it. I mean, all those bad elements I talked about actually beg you to not
to take it seriously. It is an all out comic book stuff, and if you are willing
to overlook Stallone's performance, you can enjoy yourself. The lines are so bad that sometimes you laugh at it's badness
or sometimes you just go along and laugh thinking that they are witty. Wait,
I have not mentioned about Russell. All I can say is he knows which film he is in and takes out the right measure of performance
for it. He was fantastic in Big Trouble In Little China, but it had a great script. Here, all Russell could do was
to attach some respectability to an otherwise cheap looking movie. Oh, he looks great in those drags. "Dykes on Bikes," indeed. |
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